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Feb 12, 2008


An open letter to the Snowplow Operators of the world:

Dear Snowplow Operators,

Let me first state my appreciation for the job that you do. I realize that it cannot be fun to be dragged from your warm beds in the middle of the night in order to clear the roads for the poor saps of the world who do not have 4-wheel drive, like myself. I am really grateful that you clear off the streets so that I have the option of going to class, even if I do not take advantage of it. I thought of this today as I was trying to leave my house for a noon lecture and could barely escape the tiny hill of my driveway for all the slush and ice. I hope you all felt my warm feelings for you.

However, I revoked all of these warm feelings and, instead, sent bad, cold feelings to all of you about 20 minutes later while walking into school. I realize that, when plowing the snow and such off of the street, it must go somewhere. But does it really need to be plowed onto the sidewalk where hundreds of people walk? Does it really need to be plowed onto the sidewalk WHEN PEOPLE ARE STANDING RIGHT THERE? I know you saw me struggling to get through the slush and ice without falling and chose that very spot where I was walking to shove your collected street snow. As I've mentioned, I appreciate the fact that I can drive on the streets because of you. However, I did not anticipate the attempted murder by being buried in a sideways avalanche that came directly from your snowplow. Seriously, was that necessary? That was just mean. And right after I had sent you so many psychic thanks, too.

Luckily, I avoided death by sideways avalanche (this time) and was able to get to my noon meetings, which had been canceled due to the weather. Perhaps the speakers were not so lucky as me to avoid being crushed by oncoming snowplows. I just ask you to think about these things for the next Winter Storm. Your whole job exists to help others. Do no invalidate all the good that you do by murdering the very people that you get out of bed to help. Put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Have a heart, it's almost Valentine's Day,


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