Voodoo a-comin'

The last three days have been excruciating and it’s all Jerk Face’s fault.

As a side note: Jerk Face is a realtor in Indy, and I am happy to provide Jerk Face’s name, telephone number, and website upon request. If you are looking for a realtor in the Indy area, let me know so you can keep FAR, FAR AWAY from this dirtbag.

So all is right with the world, right? We sold our house Friday! We found a great house to buy on Saturday! We discuss, price, and decide on Sunday. Monday, we make an offer! We wait by the phone. And wait. And then fall asleep, still clutching the phone that won’t ring.

As a little background, the transaction of selling our house took less than an hour Friday afternoon and was conducted mostly by phone. An offer was made by our Buyer (<3). We countered. He accepted! Done, easy. Thus, we are spoiled.

Anyway, so we continued to wait. We waited until 10:30 this morning to get their offer back. Their AWFUL, TERRIBLE, INSULTING offer, which looked like they didn’t even notice our offered price, coming down only $2500 from their list. Also? They wanted it back by 5pm today after taking 2 days to get back to us. JERK FACE. Finally, they wanted OUR Buyer’s (<3) preapproval letter and contact/bank information. Yeah, um…. No.

So we counter-countered. Strike the contingency bit. Offered slightly higher price than before. Sign. Fax. Wait.

Quicker this time, we got their counter-counter-counter offer. A slightly bigger drop in price. But the radon mitigation that they previously agreed to cover? No more. “Buyer’s expense.”

GAH!

So we’ll submit our counter-counter-counter-counter offer. Agree to the price, but you shmucks pay the radon business. Or, if I were you, have the Jerk Face realtor pay it.

I haaaaaaaaaaaaaate this. I want to just call them up – they both are affiliated with the university – and say, “Hi! Love your house! What’s your bottom line? We’ll take it for that, as-is, done and done.” Seriously, how hard is this? Move it along, boys.